One day I heard someone say, “Having children is like rolling dice; you never know how they’re going to turn out.” If I was never nervous about parenthood prior to hearing that statement, in that moment they began to exist. My take away from that statement was that no matter how much you try to give or create the best nurturing environment for your children you really have no say in how their future will be. Is this really true?
Now that I’m a mother of two little black boys I feel the ultimate weight of responsibility and praying that my dice roll yields me the best odds. On this journey I’m learning that as much as I am trying to raise them to be great men, they too are raising me. Their reactions and responses to things I may say and do is a reminder that no matter how young they are, they are mini humans with feelings and boundaries. It’s also important for me to know that how I treat them today will determine how they treat me tomorrow. Am I trying to be their friend? Absolutely not. Rather, it’s important for me to foster an environment in which they should feel comfortable coming to me when they are in trouble or made a mistake.
I can admit, at times, my reaction can be extreme then I remind myself that I (we) will get nowhere if I respond to every situation like a crazy woman. LOL. So they are teaching me to yield them the same patience and grace I would someone else’s child or some of the interesting adults I encounter on a daily. All in all, I’m a work in progress. They‘re raising me as I’m raising them.